Thursday, December 12, 2013

I Remember - FREE on Amazon Dec 12 - 16!

The holiday is putting me in a gift giving mood, so my gift to everyone is I Remember, my very first book, is now FREE on Amazon from Dec. 12th  - 16th.  Be sure to tell all your friends, family, co-workers and everyone you know.  Don't have time to read it right now, no problem, go ahead and download your copy to your digital device, off of Amazon, and read it later.  This offer is a one time thing and will not last long.

Here's the link to Amazon US, but is available worldwide:

Amazon - US Purchase Link - I Remember

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Cover Reveal - Unbound by Cat Miller

I have the honor of being able to share the cover reveal for my good friend and author, Cat Miller.  Her Forbidden Bond Series is absolutely amazing!  Unbound is the first title in her series and while I could say quite a bit about the book, I think it best to let the synopsis speak for itself. 

Girl gone wild . . .

College is supposed to be a time of discovery, but Danielle Vaughn never imaged it would be like this: heightened senses, supernatural powers, and a sudden craving for human blood. Dani is a demi-vamp, the daughter of a human psychic and a vampire noble, a living secret kept hidden for twenty-one years.
As Dani’s heritage manifests itself, her thirst for blood is matched only by her hunger for Chase Diedrick. But as the son of the Vampire Council’s most powerful ruling family, Chase is already promised to another. Dani saw Council politics destroy her mother’s life; she won’t let the same thing happen to her. Besides, there’s no shortage of men who are eager to satisfy her every need, including the alluring vampire Kayden.
Unfortunately, Dani also has no shortage of enemies. Her heightened powers of telepathy and telekinesis attract the attention of a rogue vamp who preys on gifted vampires, absorbing their skills along with their lifeblood. Now, Dani must seek the Council’s help to quickly master her new vampire life . . . or risk losing it.

The link to Cat's page on Facebook:

If you love romance books about vampires, paranormal abilities and like some sultriness in your love scenes, then don't miss this book!  It has it all.  The best romantic vamp book out there! 

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Inspiration - 15 Years Later

Tomorrow is a special day for me, my 15th Wedding Anniversary. It seems like just yesterday my husband and I were talking on the computer for the first time, then it progressed to the phone and finally in person. It was instant kismet where we were attached at the hip the moment we met. My father always teased that when it was right, it would feel like I'd been hit by a Mack truck and I did.

I can't remember the day or moment that I knew he would be my forever love, but I was quite aware, prior to our meeting in person, that this man would at least be my best friend in life. I know that may sound weird to some, but three weeks into talking on the phone and we were completing each others sentences.

The way we met was not in the traditional sense and we've gone through a variety of hurdles in life that would surely split a couple up. However, with each step back, we've managed to take a leap ahead.

To those who know me well, this is how the Remembrance Series started, based on the love my hubs and I share and how we met. Of course the rest is 100% fiction, but there is a small smidgen of reality in amongst the pages for those who know where to look. ;-)

To the love of my life, "You are the other half of my soul."

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

The Diva Ladies - Thanking the Authors Blog Hop

November is a month that is time to reflect about all the things you are thankful for.  As a special gratitude toward my fellow authors, I'm joining in this blog hop to say "Thank You" to all the authors out there who put in there time, creativity and efforts to bring us such wonderful stories.  I never knew what an author's life was like, but I now have a new respect for just how busy this life can be.  

I'm offering up a $10 Amazon Gift Card via Rafflecopter.  The contest starts Thursday, November 14, 2014 and runs through Thursday, November 20, 2014.  Here's the link:

Thanksging the Authors Rafflecopter Giveaway

Be sure to stop by other author, blogger, etc. blog sites for a chance to enter their giveaways:  

Link to Other Authors, Bloggers, Etc. Giveaways

Happy Thanksgiving!

Thursday, November 7, 2013

Loving You is now LIVE on the Internet $0.99 Intro Price

My third book, second in the Remembrance Series, is now LIVE on Amazon and Smashwords.  I'll come back out and add links as the book goes live worldwide with Amazon and Barnes & Noble.

Here are the links to date:

Amazon U.S. Loving You

Smashwords - Loving You

The $0.99 price will be in effect thru November 21, 2013, to celebrate it's release (and my anniversary).

Here's the blurb as a reminder of what the book is about:

In Book One, the couple discovered their past life together in Victorian Virginia and the mysterious circumstances surrounding their deaths.  Now, with help from their visionary guide and other mediums, they must follow the clues to uncover who caused their demise during the time of America’s War of Independence. 

Both Jordan and Gregory know that they can’t be married until all the mysteries of the past are solved; so they secretly plan their wedding as they travel to Philadelphia, seeking to identify the witch and minions who have foiled their nuptials in the past and seek to prevent their upcoming trip to the altar. 

But this time, something’s different.  They experience the manifestation of powers that they have never had before and become stronger, as the darkness becomes bolder in an effort to destroy the couple.   Can they remember their past?  Can they remember their love?  Or will the darkness stop them, once again, before they can proclaim, “I Remember Loving You!”

Rafflecopter Giveaway Contest - Celebrating 1500 Likes on FB!

I hit the 1500 + mark on my author page on Facebook:

Author Cynthia P. O'Neill

As a Thank You to everyone who helped get me there, I am hosting a contest with several authors and bloggers.  There are many ebooks, Amazon Gift Cards and swag being offered up for the giveaway.  The more you enter, the better your chances of winning.  Here's the Link:

Celebrating 1500 Likes Rafflecopter Giveaway

Feel free to share this with everyone you know!  

Friday, November 1, 2013

Cover Reveal for Loving You - Remembrance Series, Book 2

Coming Very SOON!  The second book in the Remembrance Series.  It can be read as a stand alone, though I highly recommend reading I Remember first to get the full jest of the story.

Here's the blurb and cover:

Gregory Riley and Jordan Carlisle are destined to meet and marry to fulfill an ancient prophesy and defeat evil once and for all.  However, the powers of darkness have managed to intervene and prevent their marriage throughout time and history.   In each era and place, they are drawn to one another by an overwhelming and all-powerful love that defies explanation.  However, they are always mysteriously murdered before they can say “I do”.

In Book One, the couple discovered their past life together in Victorian Virginia and the mysterious circumstances surrounding their deaths.  Now, with help from their visionary guide and other mediums, they must follow the clues to uncover who caused their demise during the time of America’s War of Independence. 

Both Jordan and Gregory know that they can’t be married until all the mysteries of the past are solved; so they secretly plan their wedding as they travel to Philadelphia, seeking to identify the witch and minions who have foiled their nuptials in the past and seek to prevent their upcoming trip to the altar. 

But this time, something’s different.  They experience the manifestation of powers that they have never had before and become stronger, as the darkness becomes bolder in an effort to destroy the couple.   Can they remember their past?  Can they remember their love?  Or will the darkness stop them, once again, before they can proclaim, “I Remember Loving You!”

Sunday, October 20, 2013

What I do when I write...

I know it is a crazy title, but I bet you didn't know the following, when I write:

- I read a lot in the genre I'm writing in. While I'm into my own story, I do like to keep my mind going and not focus only on my storyline. Keeping an open mind and reading a lot helps me change the plot, as I write. Reading and real life happenings are inspirational, too.

- I have the outline of the story set prior to writing. But, it isn't always set in stone. I haven't written once, where the storyline hasn't changed. I find that as I write, I get little AHA moments and the tale begins to take on its own life. I just write how it wants to be told.

- I can write pretty much anywhere. I do admit, I don't fancy loud or populated areas. They are distracting and it is hard to tune out what people are saying at times. I do prefer quiet places. I guess that's why I like to write late at night and the wee hours of the morning.

- I often write with my faithful four legged fur babe close by. If I stay up late, he's at my feet while I'm typing away. If I'm writing during the weekend, he has himself wedged behind my computer desk, usually snoring away.

- If I'm unsure of a concept I want to place in the book, I often run things by my husband, mother or one of my trusted Beta readers.

- My mind never really shuts off with thinking. I don't know why, but it never has. I'm continually coming up with new ideas for potential stories. However, when I'm writing, my mind is in a continual loop over the story at hand, replaying different scenes, going through the motions of the book and altering things slightly to see how they would play out. Sometimes this is frustrating and other times I approach the story at a new angle and end up with a new idea to try.

- I've often been found at the keyboard with my eyes closed, leaning back in the chair and typing away at the keys. Good thing I was excellent at typing in school. :-) When the scene is difficult to get down, I often let my imagination take over my typing. It sounds crazy, I know, but it works. Some scenes run smoothly onto paper like perfectly tempered chocolate. Other scenes are difficult to describe and harder to write down. I guess I would relate those scenes to trying to climb a rocky mountain side with a heavy weighted backpack strapped on. They may be difficult, but once the climb is done (or the scene in this case), you cherish the struggle.

- I often have an iced tea or water nearby to keep hydrated and I snack on protein rich snacks and fresh fruit to keep me going.  I don't like sugary substances or carbohydrates to make me sluggish and slow down my thinking.  
- Almost forgot...if I'm running on little sleep, which I often do, then coffee is definitely present!  Right now my favorite flavor creamer is Italian Sweet Cream and Peppermint Mocha. 

Okay, enough about my quirks when I write. Now I need to get back onto the story at hand. My characters are starting to pace the floor and are giving me glaring looks. Trust me when I tell you that you don't want to be caught in one of Garrett's glares.  He could melt the soles off your shoes!  LOL!

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Halloween Memories - Blog Hop/Giveaway

Halloween Memories - Blog Hop/Giveaway  - Starts October 16th and Runs through midnight, October 31st. 

This is a hard post, because there are so many fond Halloween memories from my childhood; but, my favorites all are current with my son.  I love the holidays, but I love them even more looking at them through his wonderment.

Last year would have to be one of my fondest Halloween memories.  We started out the month decorating the house inside and out.  The older my son gets, the more he wants to decorate things.  He lets me know when I've put things in the wrong place and has an excellent memory of letting me know where I had things from the year before.

By mid-October, we had an amazing field trip to a local petting farm, in which husband's parents joined us for the excursion.  At the end of the tour, we were able to go into the pumpkin patch and each pick out a pumpkin.  They were small things, but ones you could easily paint or draw on and sit inside.  My heart swelled when he asked, "I have one for me, but can yours and daddy's pumpkins go to our neighbors, so they have one to enjoy, too?"  He's always thinking of others.

When it came to picking a costume, he wasn't quite sure what he wanted to be for Halloween, so we finally decided on two costumes on an online auction.  We decided to let fate decide what he should dress up as.  The choices were a police man, so he could dress like his uncle, or Aniken Skywalker, right before he became Darth Vader, in Star Wars III.  We put our bids in and Aniken won.

To say my son was enthused, was putting it mildly, until the costume arrived.  It was much nicer than the ones available at all the stores.  Plus, with him being a Star Wars enthusiast, he had to put it on immediately to give his "Seal of Approval".  The completed look, with lightsaber, was amazing!  Our son's hair color and skin tone matched that of Hayden Christensen, the one who played Aniken, so he looked like his mini-me, literally!  My husband and I had wanted to dress him up like this years earlier, but he was always too short for the costume.

Halloween day came and we joined with several of our friends for a party, followed by trick or treating.  The neighborhood we went to is not that far from our own, but what we found floored us.  Almost all the houses were decorated for Halloween, plus one block, just to make things easier, had all the neighbors lined up in chairs handing out candy.  They wanted to be able to see all the trick-or-treaters and to save the parents from the extra walking.  Almost too good to be true.  He usually had his pumpkin pail only get a fill to maybe half or less, but last year the thing was almost to the top.  He was super delighted.

This year, being a Star Wars nut, I tried talking him into Darth Vader, because it fit him like a glove.  But, he had his own ideas and is a x-ray skeleton instead.  I can work with that, since we are studying what the names and locations of the bones are anyhow.

Looking forward to another amazing Halloween and Fall!

To enter my giveaway, via Rafflecopter, for a chance at a $5 Amazon gift card:  

<a id="rc-e45d7f0" class="rafl" href="" rel="nofollow">a Rafflecopter giveaway</a> <script src="//"></script>

To check out other blogs associated with this giveaway: 

Saturday, October 12, 2013

The Life of an Author

Funny title, I know, but I'm being insightful today.

At one time, when I first started writing, considered myself a hobby writer.  I would write when the mood struck, but I didn't have a timetable or follow any specific rules to things.  Now that I've managed to complete a couple of books, I find that I look at myself as a part-time writer.  While being a full-time one would be ideal, it doesn't actually fit into my life's schedule.  For me family, along with their needs, come first, then writing comes second.  It is becoming more and more of a career; one of which I love!

The first book was one that took forever to write, because I feel victim to the naysayers that I shouldn't "waist my time".  Well, you see how much I listen.  I do admit I stopped more than once and almost gave up, but I truly do love writing.  I have found that it is my stress relief, it allows me to put really 'out there' ideas on paper and see if they could potentially work.  I let my dreams become my stories, or maybe it's my stories that are becoming my dreams.  Either way...I get to share my thoughts, my false realities, my fantasies with others.  Isn't that what life is about, allowing oneself the right to be heard?

I thought that after the first book, the writing would get easier.  In some instances, it has and in others it has not.  I know an explanation is in order.  In one respect, the more my work goes to the editor(s), the more defined my writing gets, because I see my mistakes and try to prevent myself from making the same ones continually.  I find that instead of rambling on about a scene, I am able to get directly to the point without compromising the information.   So there are plus sides to continued writing...the more you write the stronger one should get. 

On the flip side, there is also self doubt.  Yes, I know I shouldn't succumb to that, but once a book is out there, you have the added pressure of the next book having to be at least as good, and most likely better than the last.  You wonder if your words and thoughts are equal to those that you have written before.  You feel the need to make your mark on the writing world and have your name be known.  Well, that would work if that's all I was interested in, but it's not!

Granted, it would be nice to have my name known more.  But, I find success in the mere fact that I'm following my dream and putting my words out there for others to enjoy.  I write for pleasure, for fun and just because I want to. 

I am no longer a wannabe author.  My words are now sealed in paper and electronic form for a long time.  Some will enjoy my stories, while others do not.  While my preferred audience is in the romantic spectrum, I do plan to grow and challenge myself to jump outside my comfort zone and seek to write in areas that intrigue me.  My world is still very much my own, following my family's schedule, but I now incorporate timelines, due dates and potential release dates into the mix of things and I couldn't be happier! 

For those who are wondering what I'm working on:

"Loving You" - the second book in the Remembrance Series, is about to go to the formatter this week.  It is set to release in November 2013. 

The second book in the Learning Series, "Learning to Let Go," is in the making and is due to the editors on December 1st with a potential release date early 2014, with the final installment (possibly final, still undetermined how many books will be included in this series) due in May 2014. 

Sunday, August 25, 2013

Deadline Phobia - A bit stressed out!

I guess the title accurately describes how I'm feeling. I'm a little MIA right now because of an approaching deadline.

I had planned everything perfectly, or so I thought, on writing the next portion of I Remember, which will be called Loving You, out to the minute detail, giving me plenty of time to edit and play around with the story. To say that, "Plans are meant to be broken," is the understatement of the year!

I started off good, was following a nice pace, even had time to allow myself time to take a day off from writing here and there, but threw a curve ball and it was a major one. But, in life a little rain must fall and we have the option of taking the lemons or making lemonade. Well, those who know me, know that I always like to change things up and I love to make things sweet!

Okay, so I was thrown off course with a sinus infection, then it coming back on me with asthmatic bronchitis to boot. Didn't feel up to writing for several days at a time, here and there. But, I used the time to think my story through and keep replaying scenes in my mind and making mental notes what to keep and what to get rid off.

Then to top things off, hubby, who I have to admit is my muse in writing my stories. Yes, I take a bit of his personality and characteristics and incorporate them into my leading man, because I do love the other half to my soul completely! Anyhow, he's called out of town on business for a week, leaving me to take care of everything at home. I don't mind and can handle it, just he usually distracts our son for a few hours at night so I can have time to write. Well, no writing occurred because time didn't allow and my creativity wasn't flowing without my muse here.

Now, I have two to three days to pull off a miracle of getting this book done. I'd actually joked with my editor that I might have to send it to her in bits and pieces, while I'm finishing it up. Little did I know the joke would be on me; that this might be the case. LOL!

But, I'm taking it in stride. We can try to plan for things and hope for the best, but when life doesn't seem to want to agree, you need to take a step back, take it all in stride and come up with other alternatives to getting to your goal. So with that, I'm going MIA for most of the weekend in order to complete this book and get to my edits next week, so I can then give it to my editor at the beginning of next month.

When that's's on to the next book in the Learning Series. My mind is so overwhelmed with ideas for the book, that I can't wait to get back to it. The first chapter and the outline are already done and I'm raring to go on it!

Take care and hope your days are bright and filled with tons of delight!

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

This Author's Life: Learning to Trust Tour Guest Post

This Author's Life: Learning to Trust Tour Guest Post:   When Garrett Andrews finds something that catches his eye, he goes after it, letting nothing stand in the way of what he wants to ...

Sunday, August 18, 2013

REVIEW BY: It Started with a Book Blog: Learning to Trust by Cynthia P. O'Neill

It Started with a Book Blog: Learning to Trust by Cynthia P. O'Neill: ***This is a contemporary/erotic romance suitable for mature audiences only, ages 18+.*** Description: When Garrett Andrews finds...

Learning to Trust is NOW AVAILABLE!

I know....I'm falling behind on my blogging, but I've definitely been busy.  Learning to Trust, the first book in the Learning Series, came back from my amazing formatter early and I've been busy plugging it and getting it ready for the release party we had on Facebook on Friday.'s currently on sale for $0.99, through tomorrow night.  Here's the ad: 

Here are the links:

Available Worldwide via Amazon and Barnes & Noble, though top links are posted below:


I've had some of the same questions asked about the book, so here are the answers:

When is the next book coming out?    The first couple of chapters are written.  It is due at the editor's in November.  I'm hoping, fingers crossed here, that I can release in December at the earliest, early January at the latest.  

Will it continue to be in Laurel's POV (point of view)?   This book will not be limited to her POV.  I want the readers to get to know Garrett better, so I will definitely be adding his POV (he definitely has a kinky mind), and maybe Grace's, for a chapter or two.  

There's a lot of questions left unanswered with the first one.  We will learn more about Garrett's past and issues?   Will we learn more about Chase and what he looks like?  I purposefully left some mystery so it would carry over into the next books.  You'll definitely learn more about Garrett's past (some things you won't even see coming).  The start of a mystery will begin to unfold in the next book and will carry to the third one.  Chase didn't need to have a full description in this one, but if you want to know what he will be described as, please feel free to visit my page on Pinterest I have dream cast board for Learning to Trust on it.  He will be described in full detail in the next book.  

Will Chase get punished for what he did?  I can't give away the details of the book.  But, rest assured, Garrett is looking out for Laurel and let's not forget, his mom is a Judge!  

Both of the characters will have a lot of unresolved issues to deal with in the next book.  I'll try to give updates from time to time and get better about blogging.  You can always catch what's going on with my Facebook page at Author Cynthia P. O'Neill.  I hope to soon have a street team group on Facebook for anyone who wants to help promote the Learning Series.  In exchange for the help promoting it, I'll give more detailed updates on what's going on with the Learning Series, along with a few prizes from time to time.  I'll have the link listed soon on my author page, still trying to decide on a name for it.

I'll try to get out here to post more on a regular basis.  Thank you to everyone who has bought the book and liked it!  


Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Things you didn't know about me...

To my surprise, I've had people request to know more information than what my author bio lists.  Okay, let's see how crazy and quirky, I can get.

Things you might not know about me:

1.  My husband and I met in a similar fashion to how Jordan and Gregory met in my first book, I Remember.  That's actually what inspired the idea behind the story.  We fell in love via computer.  When we first met, it was kismet and we've been attached at the hip ever since.  Going on 15 years this year! 

2.  I've lived in Florida all my life.  Actual, third generation Floridian.  I know - rare right!

3.  My first venture out of the state was on my Honeymoon, which actually took me out of the country as well.  (I've since made up for going outside of the state, having visited Kentucky, Indiana, Ohio, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Bahamas, U.S. Virgin Islands and the British Virgin Islands).

4.  I have goals to see as many of the 50 states and other countries as possible.

5.  This one might surprise you....I never really dreamed of being a writer.  Yes, you read that correctly.  My mind has always been imaginative, creating new games, fantasies, and so forth, but I was hesitant to write anything down. 

6.  What changed my mind about writing?  The overwhelming desire to finally write and letting my dreams come out on paper, plus the encouragement of my family.

7.  What's my all time favorite food indulgence?  Hmm...there are so many selections out there, but a good surf and turf meal sounds really appealing.  I like a good steak and seafood.  Also, love an amazing well thought out salad! 

8.  Favorite color:  When I'm passionate about things, I love burgundy, wines, mauves and golds.  When I need a calming effect, I love medium blues.

9.  Favorite band:  Depends on what mood I'm in.  When I'm in the uber romantic mood, I love listening to boy bands and Savage Garden.  When I'm writing the more sensual books, a little harsher rock band music. 

10.  What's my favorite music?  I'm ecclectic in my musical tastes.  I can listen to anything from classical all the way to heavy metal. 

11.  Favorite vacation places:  Anything with a Beach and a pool!  Though I also love a good winter vacation with snow too, but the beach is the all time winner!

12.  Hobbies:  I love to spend time with my family, cook, play the piano, be creative with crafts (flower arrangements, needle point and ceramics), of course write and swim.

13.  Favorite Movies:  I prefer comedies, romantic comedies, animation, some sci-fi, and some action movies.

14.  Desktop or Laptop Computer preference:   Both, pending which room I'm writing in.  Though lately, my laptop, because it's faster.

15.   Favorite Authors:  This too is ecclectic tastes.  Stephenie Meyer, Nora Roberts, E.L. James, Sylvia Day, Jessica Gibson, Nicole Chase, Katie Ashely, Raine Miller, the list is endless.  I can read a good young adult romance, paranormal romance, historical romance, contemporary/erotic, suspense, etc.  If it's written well, I usually like it.

16.  Major Author or Indie:   Both, though lately I prefer Indie Authors.  They have more creativity in their books and to me the stories are more appealing. 

17.  Favorite Go To/Comfort Food:  Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwiches.  Don't know why, but they are appealing and definitely easy to handle while you're trying to sit, eat and write at the same time.  LOL!

18.  Most disliked food:  Mushrooms!  Sorry, but I have a hard time liking them, especially when they are known as a fungus and the conditions in which they grow. 

19.  Favorite Indulgence:  Pepsi Max or a Coke Zero.   You thought I would say chocolate here, hmm!  Actually, I would prefer to say that, just can't eat much of it...if I could I would say a scoop of chocolate ice cream on a sugar cone, simple but tasty!

20.  Dog or cat person:  Definitely a dog lover!  I have a hypo-allergenic breed of dog. (My other baby.)  While I like cats, I'm highly allergic to them.  Had a tuxedo cat once, that's how I found out I'm allergic.  Crazy cat loved corn on the cob!  He would literally attack you for it!  No Kidding!

21.  Car or Truck:   While cars are nice, I've gotten spoiled with an SUV so I would have to say SUV or Truck.

22.  Disney or Universal:  I'm a classic Disney fan, but I do love the Harry Potter World and look forward to riding the new Transformers ride sometime in the near future.

23.  Favorite Season:  I live in Florida....the seasons hardly change, only differing slightly in temperature.  So I would have to say Fall/Winter, only because of the humidity and heat index in the summer.  (Plus, let's not forget the hurricane threats from June to October.) 

24.  Favorite Holiday:  Christmas, without question.  I love to decorate and bake during that time of year.

25.  If I had the chance to do my life over, would I?  Not a chance!  Life is a roller coaster filled with ups and downs, you take the good with the bad and eventually find yourself where you were meant to be.  Everything that I have and everything that I am is because of the journey I have taken to get here.  I love my life, my family, my now and my forever! 


Friday, July 19, 2013

I Remember is Released and on Sale!

In celebration of it's release, I've decided to lower the price of I Remember on Amazon and Barnes & Noble for a four day weekend sale!

Here's the link to Amazon:

Here's the link to Barnes & Noble:

Reviews:  :

Some comments are: 

My Review:

"I Remember is one of those books that you can't put down. It is a sweet love story that takes place in modern times but flashes back in Jordan's dreams. Comforted by strong mysterious arms and whispers of together for eternity is what keeps the nightmares at bay.

Gregory answers a personal ad that sounds like it was written... just for him. Getting to know his online possible soulmate, Gregory feels a deep connection that he can't explain.

When Jordan and Gregory finally meet...that's when the real fun begins!

Cynthia did a really great job with the beginning of this series. Very detailed and never a dull moment, I Remember ends with the promises of the adventure continuing into another great era. "

"What a great book, I felt so close to Jordan, it was like reading my own story, with her dad getting sick, him having cancer and pass away, her grief and missing him. Just meeting a wonderful man. All that could be my life story, besides all the rest.

You will read that there is more to Jordan and Gregory then just what it appears to be, they have a very tight connection, that is longer then many think. It has history in it, romance and a little adventure. I am sure many will like this and I can not wait to read the next!!

I reviewed this for Release Day Diva mini tours."

Saturday, July 6, 2013

The Inspiration behind I Remember

I know I'm probably going to be asked this question, in the future, so I might as well go ahead and put it out there.  A lot of my writing is inspired by either things I read, watch, experience or even my own personal life.  Though, of course, I take the inpirations and change them up to make them entirely ficitonal. 

My inspiration for the start of the book is actually how my husband and I first met, via computer.  My main characters, Jordan and Gregory, also meet via computer and have an instant connection.  The people who know me best, will find little hints here and there to my life.  But, I'm hoping the readers will be left wondering what those areas are. 

The ideas for this book came about eight years ago in the form of dreams.  The dreams kept building on each other until one day someone asked me if I had ever considered writing a Young Adult book.  Over the course of the next two weeks, the story played out completely in my dreams.  I realized there was too much to tell in the form of one book, so I've opted to divide the books up, based on certain aspects and play it out a little at a time.  There will be many challenges the characters will have to face and plenty of exciting twists and turns, that you will not see coming. 

Now, on to book two, called Loving You.  Here's a little clue to the titles to come.  When the books are placed next to one another, you will find they spell out a sentence.  ;-) 

Have a great week all!

P.S.  I may be slowly moving this blog towards my new website, which can be found at    

My first book is LIVE on Amazon!

My first book, a Young Adult Paranormal Romance, called I Remember, part of the Remembrance Series, is now live on Amazon, for only $2.99.  Here is the hyperlink to it:

If you are a fan of young adult books, but also like a little paranormal occurances and histrocial references, then I'm hoping you will find my book appealing.  The books to follow will dive further into the story with more historical and paranormal activity, though no werewolves, vampires, or the like.  Though you will see dark spirits and an evil witch trying to prevent a prophecy from coming true. 

Hope you enjoy!

P.S.  I'm hoping to have links to Barnes & Noble and Smashwords up soon too! 

Monday, June 3, 2013

I have NEWS!

I know it has been a while since I have done a blog, but there is a good reason.  There is a lot of news to share:

  1. I Remember went to the editor, mid-May, and is now back in my hands.  I am currently working, feverishly, to make all the corrections, check the story and add a couple dream sequences back into play.  I will need to send the new additions back to the editor to check for consitency and then it is off to the formatters on June 10th!
  2. Learning to Trust is completely written!!!  I'm in the process of making my final edits, before sending it off to the editor on June 7th.  I will need to make any necessary corrections, send it back for a final read through, and fix any last minute items.  Then it will be off to the formatter on July 8th. 
  3. I Remember is heading for an early July release.  I have the release party scheduled on Facebook and will be announcing it on the blog shortly. 
  4. Learning to Trust is headed for an early August release.  The release party is scheduled for Facebook, as well.  I will announce the date sometime in July. 
  5. The outlines for the next books in both series are complete and I am trying to figure out a reasonable writing schedule in which both can be done, so I can announce Coming Soon dates.  My hope is to release both before the year is up, if not at least one before the year is up and the other at the beginning of the year.  I have a very aggressive scheudle planned.

My website is currently up and running, though still in tweaking mode, so there are changes coming to it.  If you would like to go out and peruse the site, it is located at

I'll try to put another blog up soon with the book party release dates!  ;-)

Saturday, May 4, 2013

Too Much Going On...But Loving It!

My first book, I Remember, book one from the Remembrance Series, has been in limbo since late March.  The editor I was going to use is a dear friend of mine and was doing me a favor, but their schedule is so overwhelming that they will not be able to get to it for some time.  Given that, I have found another editor who will be looking at my first chapter and seeing if our writing styles mesh.  If they do, she will get the book on May 20th and we can hopefully get back on track for release.  I am being optimistic when I say I would like to release by late June/early July with this book.  I should know more in a few weeks.  (This is a Young Adult/Paranormal Romance.)

My other book, which is the first book of a second series I am working on, called Learning to Trust, part of the Learning Series, will be going to an editor on June 1st.  I have only a few more scenes to write and then go through my own edits before sending it off.  According to the editor, I may be able to release this book by late June/early July, too.  But, my focus is on releasing the other one first, allowing a few weeks to a month in between before releasing this one.  (This one is a steamier Romance, though I am still unsure as to which category it falls under.  I'm thinking Contemporary Romance, but some of my beta readers are trying to push me into the spicier category since the market is trending in that direction now.  So we'll see.)

Things are looking up and I am super excited about this experience.  Just when I think I have learned all there is to know about writing, editing, formatting and releasing, I discover a whole other side to things that I need to deal with.  It is a roller coaster of emotions, even some fears, but the adrenalin rush on this is amazing!

As a favor to my Facebook and Twitter followers, I released the cover to Learning to Trust, yesterday.  So I am posting it here too!


Have a wonderful weekend all!

Monday, April 29, 2013

Writing, Deadlines, Giveaways, etc.

Sadly, I still do not have a release date for I Remember.  My editor is overwhelmingly swamped with work and deadlines, so that book, while completely written, is in limbo for a release date.  I am still hoping maybe late Spring or early Summer, for a release.  I will keep everyone updated on how things are progressing.  We do have a back-up plan, just in case her work load gets worse.  But, I am willing to wait on her, only because I call her a friend and trust her judgement, because she is an accomplished writer and definitely knows her stuff (for a lack of a better word). 

As for Learning to Trust, it is now on an official deadline for completion.  I do not have much left to do, but between hubby's and son's schedule, sometimes writing time is hard to come by.  I do need to be completed within the next week to two weeks, with the writing.  Then I need to give myself a week or so to step away from the project before going back and doing my own round of edits.  I will be sending this story to an editor as of June 1st.  So, we could be looking at a potential release either late June or early July.  This one might release around the same time, if not before, the other. 

In terms of Giveaways...I am part of a multi-author, blogger, etc. giveaway, via Rafflecopter, on Facebook.  I'm putting up a $10 Amazon Card as part of the giveaway.  Others are listing copies of ebooks, Amazon cards, and other items.

As an incentive to those entering the giveaway, when my Facebook Author page reaches 200 likes, I will do a cover reveal for Learning to Trust. 

There is a lot going on right now and I am excited!

Have a wonderful week! 

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Busy, Busy, Busy....At least that's what I try to tell myself!

Sorry I haven't posted a blog in a while.  I truly have been busy.  I finished the final edits on the first book of the Remembrance Series, called I Remember.  It has been in my editors hands for many weeks now.  Her schedule is completely booked, so I am currently holding on when I can release that book, but also anxious to finally have a book out there!  This will be my first book ever, part of a Young Adult Paranormal Romance Series. 

The outline to the second part of I Remember, called Loving You, has been revamped and is currently on the back burner, while I finish up another project.  I am hoping to start on this book during the first week of May. 

The project I am currently working on is the opposite end of the romance spectrum.  I am not sure whether to classify the writing style as Adult Contemporary Romance or go one higher, due to some of the content.  (I am thinking it is an 18+ book.)  To get an idea of the main male character's personality and persona... imagine Christian Grey, Gideon Cross, James Cavendish, Brandon Fitzgerald, and Ethan Blackstone, kind of all rolled into one.  Garrett can be intense, caring, and loving, when he wants to be. 

Book one of the Learning Series is called Learning to Trust.  It deals with both the main female (Laurel) and male (Garrett) characters, having to deal with issues that have destroyed their ability to trust others and live life to the fullest.  They find an intense connection with one another that allows their hearts to take chances they normally wouldn't, giving the ability to "Learn to Trust."

I promised a copy of the cover for I Remember, so here it is: 

Again, I don't know when the book will be released.  I am hoping for a month, maybe two tops.  As soon as I have a potential date, I will definitely post it!

Have a wonderful rest of the week everyone!

Friday, March 29, 2013

Reflecting - Relaxing - Working

I am happy to announce that I am done with "I Remember."  I have finished with the rewrites and my part of the editing and it is now in the hands of my editor.

While I am waiting to hear what kind of changes are needed in the book, I am already putting the final touches on the outline to part two in the Remembrance Series, called "Loving You."  Thanks to pulling a major scene and pushing it into this book, I already have a 7,000+ word head start.   

The day I finished, I took a moment to reflect on how long this journey has taken and how wonderful it feels to have completed it.  I decided to take a few days to catch up on some much needed sleep and reading.  My TBR (to be read) pile has grown considerably and it is time to take a few books out of the pile. 

Some may ask, why spend time reading when you should be writing.  (I have actually been asked this question numerous times.)  The answer is easy...sometimes when you are writing, you stumble across a brick wall, or writer's block.  I don't know about everyone else, but for me, I like to step away from the scene and either jump to another area of the book or stop working on it entirely and read a book.  I find that reading allows my mind to let go of anxiety, imagine, and become one with the story.  It also provides you with new thoughts and ideas.  Let me ask this, "How many times have you read a story and said to yourself, 'That's a nice idea, but what if it went this way instead?'"  That is the writer in all of us!  This is why we read a lot!

Today I decided to take a look at a story that I have had on hold while I finished up my other story.  I have decided to go through a round of edits, to refresh me on the story and hoping to start back up on writing by next week.  I am about two-thirds complete with the story at this point and would like to see what I can do to complete it, before bouncing back to my other series.  Besides, the two main characters are giving me heck in my dreams, demanding that I complete this portion of their story!  :-)

I am also trying to get everything finalized for my website, so it can finally be up and running.  I will let everyone know on here when it is ready to go.  Also, be sure to check back sometime within the next week.  I will go ahead and post my cover for I Remember. 

Have a wonderful weekend!

Monday, March 18, 2013

Edits, Edits, and More Edits

Can you tell, by the title, what I am working on?  LOL.

I made a rookie mistake of getting too detailed and wordy with the first book and I am now paying my dues trying to tighten the story and trim as much as possible.  I have been doing an on again/off again, approach to the editing, so I don't become numb to the story line.

To date, I have been able to trim 25,000+ words, pushed one major scene over to book two, Loving You, (which now has a good start at 6,000+ words) and am slowly approaching the end of my editing.  Only about 75 pages left.  Can I get a big WOOHOO, from everyone?!

My only fear is that I still need to cut some more.  There are two scenes that are emotional, but could due with less detail and still have the book survive.  However, I am holding out until I absolutely have to trim them, because they mean a great deal to me.  Plus, I fear a scene that I am coming up on needs several more lines of clarification. 

Sorry this blog is short this week, but my focus is on getting this done.  I want to stop talking about the book and release it already!

Back to editing....  ;-)

Monday, March 11, 2013

What Are You Working On?

I have written posts about my first Valentine's with my sweetie, about sources of negativity that has, at times, affected my ability to write, and about how much is involved in getting a thought from your head to actual publication.  But, I just realized that I never mentioned anything about my works in progress (WIP). 

For eight years, I held a story idea in my head, never fully believing that I had the ability to convey the concept into words.  I allowed the story to grow, gathering new insights and details, based on my life and the world around me.  Try as I might, I was never able to complete the vision or allow myself to write it down. 

Several months later, some of my mom friends were discussing various books and authors.  We compared our likes and dislikes of various genres, when one finally asked, "Have you ever written anything, and if so have you thought about writing a Young Adult novel?  They are currently quite popular for a variety of age groups."

I had admitted to writing a couple of children's books, tales my father had spun to me as a child, that I wanted my family to know.  Our group encouraged me to give it a try, but I dismissed the idea, or so I thought, until my dreams started to demand the written word.

Over the course of the next week, the tale in my head intensified through my dreams and played out to fruition.  I discussed the concept with my husband, wondering what I should do.  He told me not to dismiss the idea and give it a try.  He said, "You never know until you try.  If it is something you want to do, I will support you.  But, you need to take that first step."

He was right.  I fought the idea of sitting and writing, believing myself doomed to failure before I even started.  However, my story would not let up, as the characters developed even further until one day I found myself in front of my laptop and began to type out a few words.  Granted, it took six attempts to get the right words to start the book, and since then I have completely re-written the beginning, but it was enough to get me going. 

I promised myself that if I reached 50 pages, I would keep going.  Then, once I hit 100 pages, I would commit to the next 100, until the book was complete.  Of course, I stopped, started, stopped, started, and so on, thanks to negativity, fear, and a severe case of writer's block, along with the need to continually edit what I had written, to ensure perfection, before finally letting go.

So after much time and effort, the first book in the series is ready to come out soon.  The cover will be revealed on my author Facebook page this week.  My final round of edits, prior to an editor, will be done by end of week. So I do not have a release date as of yet, but hope to soon.

But, what is the book about?  It is called I Remember, part 1 of 4 in the Remembrance Series.  It follows two main characters, a hero named Gregory and a heroine named Jordan, who discover an inexplicable bond to one another.  They share similar dreams about both the present and past and have been given clues to unlock the mystery of who they actually are.  Along the way, they unleash mysterious capabilities that defy explanation and they learn of a darkness set to destroy all that stands in its way.  They are guided by a divine visionary to help right where their paths went askew in the past, but will it be enough to keep their future moving forward?

Some questions that might come from this book are:   If you are faced with death, can you see life?  Can the heart trust or can it be clouded with judgement?  If you discovered you were born to hold back the evil of humanity, could you go forward on that path or would you try to alter it?  and of course... Is love strong enough to survive against all odds, even one that can destroy life?

Just wait and see....

Thursday, March 7, 2013

What's Taking So Long?

I have been asked this question, numerous times, by a variety of people.  A little over a year ago, I would be asking someone the same thing if I found out they were writing a book.  I, too, had believed that all that was required was to write it, send it out to get published and then wait for it to appear online to buy.  Seems simple enough; however, there are so many steps one must follow to get to the finish line.

An author first has to have a good idea, obviously, then they have to research it to make sure no one else has anything too similar.  If they do, they must rethink their writing plan or write something entirely new.  After the research regarding your initial thoughts, other investigation may be required, especially if you are writing anything factual in terms of medical, health, certain business processes, historical accuracy, specifics on cars, geographical locations, the list is endless. 

Once the idea is in place and the research is completed, one can start to write.  For some, they have the ability to write everyday, a certain amount of time a day and can complete things in quick order.  But, for others, you are limited by your environment.  If I had the time to just sit and devote to nothing other than writing, I could probably pop out a book every few months or more.  Unfortunately, that is not the case for me.  My family takes priority with their needs coming first, with schooling, work hours, errand running, cooking, and so forth, essentially all the duties that would typically accompany a mother and wife.  So my writing time is severely limited to early mornings, late evenings, the wee hours past midnight and the occasional weekend.  So my pace is a little slower than some, but each day I add a little more to the process and take one step closer to my goals:  Finishing my first book (done), editing it (in process), cover art (done), beta/critique readers (waiting for the final edits), setting up an  Author Twitter page (done), setting up an Author Facebook page (done), setting up a blog (done), setting up a website (work in progress), setting my information up on Goodreads, Amazon and Barnes & Noble (still to do),  releasing the book (holding pattern - trying to determine date)....once again the list is endless.

There are so many steps involved in the process of a story.  When the book is done, you have to go back through it to edit areas you find are unnecessary, overly stated, not enough information, could be left out entirely, and so on.  Then you have to secure an editor to read over what you have written, as they can help smooth things out, show you details you missed and essentially assist in tightening up your writing.  After the editor, you sometimes consider enlisting the help of a proofreader, to help pinpoint errors in grammar, sentence structure, misuse of words, and even spelling mistakes or type-o's.  Once this is done, you make all the corrections and then send to your beta/critique readers, to see if what you have done is appealing to them or if they have suggestions on what would make the story even better.  During all of this, if you are tyring to get picked up by a publishing house, you have to submit query letters that summarize your work in a couple small paragraphs, to various literary agents and hope to get positive responses back and wait, for an undetermined amount of time.  If you choose the become an Indie (independent) author, you try to locate a cover artist who can best represent your book.  One has to admit, that when looking for a good book to read it is the cover that first draws you in and then the blurb on the back of the book that entices you further.  So these two items must be perfect.

While all the above is going on, you need to start branding your name or advertising yourself, via means of the Internet, word of mouth, attending various author events, and so forth.  You could wait until it is released, but why, when you can put some effort into it now.  So one needs to decide on how much time they will allot to this action and begin the marketing side of things, along with the writing, and your everyday life.

When you have all of the processes done, though I think I may be missing a few bits and pieces here and there, but at least you get the general idea that there is more to this than just writing and getting it published, you then have to focus on publication.  If you get signed with an agent and a publishing house, then you have to move at their schedule and what they want to do with your book.  If you are an indie author you have the responsibility of getting things done by setting a release date, printing the books, uploading the books to the various websites for purchase (Amazon, B & N, Smashwords, etc.), scheduling a book release party and doing a lot of public relations/marketing for your book.  One author friend summed up the process very nicely to me in these simple words, "Writing is about 10% talent and 90% being able to market yourself."  While I disagree about the low percentage of it being talent, which I feel is a much higher number, it is about being able to represent yourself to the public and getting them to listen.  Once you have their attention and they read the book, it is then carried by word of mouth, reviews, and so forth.

My apologies on the length of this blog, but I wanted to emphasize there is more to writing and publishing than what the words suggest.  I admit I have taken a long time to get the first book done.  I will honestly state that I have stopped writing on numerous occasions falling into the negativity zone buying into the idea that writing was a waste of my time, nearly giving up entirely on the idea of my dream.  But, once I finally realized that writing made me happy and that I am doing it for myself and my family, I committed to the idea of seeing everything through to completion and have since been moving much faster.  Granted there are still hiccups in the road from time to time, but I strive to spend at least an hour or more on writing/editing, every day, to ensure it is a part of my daily routine.  I have also learned to just write, not continually re-read and edit everything to get all things perfect right out of the starting gate.  If you do this you will never make your way down the track unless you learn to let go, write freely and know that you can go back and fix things when you are done; getting to the finish line is priority.  This is one reason my writing was slow in the beginning, I wanted perfection up front and did not allow myself to progress.

As for the status of the first book, it is completed, in terms of writing, just needing to finish the final steps in preparation process for release, which will happen this year.  I don't have a date set, but as soon as I know something I will post it on here.  I already have an outline to books two and three in the first series and have written a couple of scenes for book four.  The second series I have been working on, kind of back and forth, has one book nearly done (which I also plan on releasing this year), the cover art has already been selected and so on.  I have an outline to the second, in the series, nearly complete and the third of the series will have to wait for now, though I have several ideas.  I have been trying to keep new ideas about other books at bay, only writing down what I have to, in order to keep my focus, since it is easy to get caught up in a new thought.  I have established a tentative schedule of what I am writing, when, how long I will allow myself on it and when I would like to see publication, barring any unforeseen factors that life can sometimes throw at you.  So I use the word "tentative" loosely.

I am hoping this blog helps everyone understand all that is involved in getting from point A to point B in terms of writing.  Essentially, ALOT!!!   Plus, from what I hear, the first book is always the hardest because you want it to be perfect, putting so much extra care into it, which I am definitely guilty of.

Have a great week everyone!

Monday, February 25, 2013

Negativity - A Writer's Demise

I know the title is a bit strange, but the topic of negativity is forever present in the life of a writer.  Granted I have tons of ideas in a variety of different genres to write about.  However, for every idea and for every person who says, "Go for it," I have at least two or three people who try to tell me otherwise.

The statements, "What makes you think you can write?"  "Why bother?"  "You are just wasting your time."  "Couldn't you do something more constructive?"  "Who would want to read something like that?"  The comments are endless and to say a little hurtful.

My stories started to develop in my mind about eight years ago, but I failed to write anything down, because the mere mention of writing ended with the above comments.  The naysayers kept my thoughts at bay, until  the stories continued to build and finally my family, and a few friends, sat me down and said to go for it.

I finally sat down to writing my first story a little over a year ago.  It was hard allowing my mind to wonder and just let go, as I kept hearing those wonderful statements fill my mind.  So the work ethic of starting, stopping, feeling like giving up, starting again, stopping again, and...well you see the pattern, started to develop.

It wasn't until I recently committed to become a writer, found a couple of author groups that welcomed me in and guided me along the way that I finally decided....WHO CARES what others think!  I love to write.  It makes me happy and I enjoy it.  I don't have to be a mega success like Stephanie Meyer or E.L. James, Sylvia Day, or Nora Roberts.  To me, the greatest success in writing would be to see my book available for sale on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Smashwords and any other areas that I can possibly think off.  If a few people like it, then great, but I am doing something I love, so what is wrong with that!

I guess what I am trying to get across is that if you are an author or would like to give it a try, then go for it!  Don't listen to those around you.  If you love writing then by all means do it.  Negativity is a writer's worst enemy.  Buy into it and you are sure to fail; ignore it and the world of writing is only limited by your imagination. 

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

My 1st Married Valentine's

Valentine's Day, and I, never really meshed well in the past.  My hopes for my first ever Valentine's, with my newly married husband, was quickly approaching.  We were, each, secretly planning a memorable day for the other.  I had plans on purchasing some wonderful chocolate covered strawberries from one of the local chocolatiers and along with a bottle of his favorite champagne.  I had already been perusing the store ads to see who had the best price on some surf and turf options for dinner.  A romantic dinner by candlelight, with soft music playing in the background was definitely in the foreseeable future.

I felt giddy with anticipation of this Valentine's going off without a hinge, especially since the previous year had permanently tainted the month of February for me, with the death of my father.  My hubby was out to prove that good memories could be made.  He kept telling me this would be a Valentine's to remember!

Something in me told me to hesitate on buying everything.  I could not understand why, but would soon find out.  Less than a week before Valentine's Day, my husband calls me up with the distressing news, "Honey, I am sorry to tell you this, but we may have to postpone our Valentine's celebration.  The company has some issues at our south Florida office and I am being sent down to try and straighten up their mess.  They want me to drive down tomorrow morning, for an indefinite stay."

My heart numbed, as the words slowly sank in.  "How can they do this?  Don't they realize we have only been married for a couple of months?"  Tears began to form at the corners of my eyes, wondering why every Valentine's was doomed to repeat itself.

My husband came home that night and took me out to a romantic dinner, in an attempt to smooth things over.  "Believe me when I say that I would rather be here with you.  I know how much you needed this week to be wonderful and I promise to do my best to make sure it is!" 

The next morning came and I kissed and hugged him tightly, before he pulled out of the driveway, taking my heart with him.  Work helped to keep me busy, but my peers continual chatter over their plans for Valentine's put a damper on my spirits.

As promised, my husband called me several times a day to let me know how much he loved and missed me.  Neither one of us could go to bed without talking with the other.  He kept getting surprised by the numerous cards I had placed strategically throughout the course of his suitcase, expressing how much I loved and missed him.  In turn, I kept receiving cards in the mail, one a day, telling me how much he wished I were with him. 

Valentine's day came and I went to work, not wanting to hear of everybodys plans for the evening or seeing the various romantic deliveries being dropped off at the office.  I managed to hide out in my office for most of the day, diving head first into work.  It wasn't until late afternoon that I received a call from the reception area, citing an issue with one of the computers.  I walked to the front and saw the biggest arrangement of long stemmed red roses, I had ever encountered, along with a bouquet of balloons.  I quickly asked which computer was causing problems, when everyone smiled and said the arrangements were mine. 

I walked over to the flowers, and nervously looked at the card.  I could not believe that it had my name on it.  My hand shook as I removed the note, which read, "To the love of my life, my reason for existence.  I cannot wait to hold you in my arms tomorrow.  You are my forever Valentine!  Loving you always and forever, your hubby."

My mind instantly honed in on the words tomorrow.  Before I knew it, a phone was being thrust into my hand and I heard his voice, "I hope I have managed to save some portion of Valentine's honey.  Know that if I had my way I would be with you right now.  Unfortunately, the best I can do is fly in tomorrow and show you just how much you mean to me.  Can you pick me up tomorrow at the airport?" Tears streamed down my eyes at his attempt to keep this day special. 

The next day I left work early to go to the airport and pick him up.  I awaited anxiously with a long stemmed red rose and Mylar balloon in one hand and his favorite chocolate covered strawberries in the other.  My heart began to sink when his plane arrived at the gate, but he was nowhere to be found.  Then, without warning, I felt familiar arms encircle around my waist, as he kissed me gently below the earlobe, whispering, "You are my forever love, my forever Valentine.  I have missed holding you in my arms."  I turned around to get lost in his kiss.

Our Valentine's day may not have gone as planned, but that day and the weekend will forever live as one of the most memorable times of my life.

Happy Valentine's Day Everyone!

Sunday, February 10, 2013

A Chance at Love, A Lifetime of Loss

Since Valentine's Day is quickly approaching, with stories of forever love, I thought it would be nice to tell of the day going horribly wrong and share with you a short story regarding the worst date for Valentine's Day.   Enjoy!

There are stories of love in the air and visions of Cupid flittering about with his bow drawn, ready to aim his heart tipped arrow at the first person he sees that is lonely.  Well in my estimation, Cupid is blind as a bat!

I used to be one who dreamed of having Cupid's arrow hit my heart, where I would fall in love on Valentine's Day; having the perfect date, with the perfect guy and of course, dare I say again, the perfect kiss?!  Sadly, fate played a much darker card turning my Valentine's romance into a Valentine's nightmare.

Chloe started her week off with a wonderful start.  Her workplace was shifting some individuals around to one of their new offices, opening up some of the managerial positions at the financial institution where she worked.  Her boss, Derrick, offered her the chance to move up from an administrative assistant to an entry level manager of the business division.  To top things off, the guy she had been conversing with online, Vincent, for weeks on end, wanted to take her out to a romantic dinner, at the end of the week on Valentine's Day.  Everything in her life appeared to be falling into place for the first time in her life.

Mid-week came and Chloe received a call from her mother, mid-day at work.  She lifted the receiver with trepidation, knowing her family would only call work in the event of an emergency. 

"Honey, I hate to bother you at work, but it's your father.  He passed out, fell and hit his head on the coffee table at home.  We are, currently, at the emergency room where he is being admitted and tests are being run to determine why he passed out and why he hasn't been eating much the past couple of weeks," her mother, Sandra, stated.

"I'll talk to Derrick and see if I can get a few days off work.  I should be able to make to your place by early evening.  Is there anything I can do in the meantime?"  I asked, feeling totally helpless and heartbroken all in one. 

"No honey, just get here when you can."

Derrick offered to give me as much time off as I needed, offering to loan me some of his vacation time, if necessary to allow me to care for my family.  He was a strong manager, but somehow had a soft side when it came to her.

Over the course of the next two days, the doctors ran numerous tests on Chloe's father until they finally had an answer. 

She felt her heart being ripped from her chest, as Dr. Smithson explained, "I'm very sorry to inform you that Mr. Logan has an advanced stage brain tumor that is inoperable.  We estimate his life expectancy to be a few weeks, at best.  How he has managed to live this far without and symptoms is beyond comprehension.  All we can do now is to keep him comfortable."

Chloe entered her father's hospital room, wondering what to say, when her father spoke instead, "You still going on your date for Valentine's?"

"Why would I do that while you are in here dad?"

"Because I don't want to ruin your day and would prefer you go have a little fun.  You know your mother and I only want your happiness and who knows, maybe this guy could be your Prince Charming."  The determined smile on his face showed that he would not be reckoned with, despite the situation.

I argued my case anyway, but mom suggested I give in to appease my father and give him some hope.  If it were only that simple.  I knew I was in no condition to enjoy going out on a date, especially not a first date with someone I hadn't met in person before.  However, despite my better judgement, I called Vincent, explained the chaos going on in my life and to my surprise he wanted to continue with our date, even requesting to pick me up at my apartment. 

I answered the door to a tall, very tan, dark haired, blue eyed goddess.  Vincent was definitely everything his picture had promised.  My heart had skipped a beat when he said, "Hello Chloe."

My common sense told me I should make apologies and call the date off, but I made a promise to my father and I couldn't pass up this fine specimen of manhood.  Apparently, my dog had the same hesitation, because the sight of Vincent caused him to bark and growl continually, until I asked Vincent to wait down the hallway for me to grab my things and lock up. 

Vincent was the courtly gentleman, holding my hand as he led me towards his SUV.  Once there, he opened the door and reached in to pull out a long-stemmed red rose that smelled amazing. 

We ended up eating at a local Italian restaurant, close to my apartment.  Our conversation started out fine; however, my mind kept drifting to thoughts of my parents, in particular, my father.  I could not shake the feeling that I needed to be with him, because his time was drawing short. 

Despite my best efforts, I could tell Vincent was growing frustrated.  He kept demanding I pay him my full attention, otherwise he would leave.  I tried to explain my worries and how I was feeling.  His only response, "You are born, you grow up, you die and then life moves on.  Deal with it!" 

I respectfully requested that we call the date off and maybe try another time.  I guess I should have mashed the trigger to a ticking time bomb instead.  He excused himself from the table to go "calm his nerves," only he didn't return.  Instead I ended up paying for the entire meal, having to call a cab home, only to have an email waiting for me calling me, "A cold hearted witch, who was a waste of his time."

The next day I grabbed some things and headed back to my parent's house.  While in route, I called Derrick on his cell, to update him on my father's health and the need to take a couple of weeks off. 

Derrick sensed I was hurting and asked, as a friend, to tell him what was bothering me.  I took the opportunity to vent, so we ended up talking the full two hours of my drive.  He managed to soothe my nerves, calling my date a callous individual who may enjoy taking advantage of others.  He felt Vincent would have left me with the bill either way and it was probably best that our date had gone so horribly wrong. 

My nerves had calmed by the time I reached my father's hospital room.  He instantly asked about the date, so I simply explained we were just not a match. 

Over the course of the next week, my father's health took a turn for the worse.  We could tell his life was slowly slipping away from us.

Derrick, at first, called every couple of days to see how I was handling things.  When he heard that my father might only have days remaining, his calls came daily, with words of wisdom, offers to sit with us or help us with anything we might need.

To my surprise, after my father had passed and my heart felt crushed, Derrick continued to call, even dropping by to offer his condolences during the viewing.  His friendship did not stop after I returned to work.  Over time it developed into something deeper; love. 

I guess everyone can tell that the worst Valentine's Day/date of my life, also turned into one of the best.  The following year, I did not have a date with a potential boyfriend for Valentine's.  Instead, I had a date with my first Valentine's Day with my wonderful husband, Derrick!  ;-)

Here's hoping your Valentine's is something special.  If you end up having a terrible date, don't despair.  Sometimes out of horrid situations, comes the hope of eternal love.

I know...I couldn't go through with making it the worst date ever.  I am a sucker for a happy ending.  Now to those who know me...can you pick out what parts are fiction and what parts are reality?